Fighting For Connection: Our Story

by | Apr 29, 2021 | The Ferguson Journal | 0 comments

“We didn’t get married just to spend all week apart.” Reality check. When we first got married in 2008, this is how we felt. All sunshine and rainbows after the honeymoon, right? Well…yes and no. Because as in love as were (and still are), there were bills to pay. So while spending 40+ hours a week apart, we found ourselves from the very beginning of our marriage fighting for connection. 

It doesn’t seem right, don’t you think? Getting married, having kids, and being disconnected for more time than you are together. You get married because you love your person. You have kids because they bring joy, laughter, and even more love into your home. We didn’t want to miss it. We didn’t want to spend time in an office…away from each other…away from our kids. 

And this wasn’t just for me…we BOTH wanted to be home. And we fought for it.

Unconventional Living

In 2015, 3 months before our second daughter was born, my husband got laid off. I was a stay at home mom, and he was working a soul sucking job in Orange County…because, again, #bills. 

This was a turning point. We knew that he (or both of us), could suck it up and go find jobs so that we could continue to live in sunny Southern California. Or we could make a move. 

So we did it. We made the move.  We swallowed our pride, called up Daniel’s parents, and moved up to Northern California to live with them. Isn’t that what all the millennials are doing these days? 

I got a job as a barista and Starbucks (my college job), and Daniel got a job as a Personal Trainer (his college job). So basically we were back at square one. LOL.

But this time was different. This time, we had kids to prioritize. This time…every decision we made was to fight for our FUTURE as a family…for our CONNECTION as a family….for our TIME as a family.

Unconventional Decisions

Wanting to live an unconventional life (where BOTH parents are home), we knew we’d need somewhat unconventional jobs. And maybe I’ll save our career journeys for another time, but here is the moral of the story. We began saying, “no” to opportunities that, to the outside world, seemed like the wise thing to do. We began saying “yes,” to things that felt out of reach like starting a business, being self-employed, and moving up the coast to the Pacific Northwest.

And, you guys…we did it. We are still on this journey…but we did it. I get to work from home helping entrepreneurs bring their vision to life through website building, blog writing, and content creation. Daniel works only 8 hours a week outside of the home teaching little kiddos sports.

I mean…for now…these are the PERFECT jobs for us. Our kids are virtual schooling…we both get to be home the majority of the week…and we find ourselves playing in the backyard in the middle of a weekday, heading to the lake on a Friday afternoons, both attending sports practices and functions, etc etc etc.

THIS IS WHAT WE FOUGHT FOR!

What You Can Expect From Our Corner of the Internet: Connection

So for this blog post, I don’t have any “Top 10 Tips,” or “How to dos.” This is just us at our core. An Enneagram 7 (me) and an Enneagram 9 (Daniel) trying to do our best to raise our kids to love Jesus and love others. 

And what you can expect from our little family of five in the future is all things family, love, travel, adventure, PNW life, and presence. (You can follow the journey over on Instagram too!)

Connection is what we are all about. We know it’s not easy. It requires some grit…but we can only hope to inspire others to fight for it too.

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